I'm Not Pregnant Anymore

Hello, long lost readers. I've been "32 and 33 weeks pregnant" for quite some time, so I thought I'd break the silence and let you know I had my baby boy. Meet my new little 5-month-old teacher Cameron Matthew.

Asana practice has been spotty, but being a mom has introduced a new dimension to yoga practice. It tethers me to the present. I may start the day planning on a morning nap, time to sit, a long walk, or a thoughtful post. But that sitting practice may turn into a nursing session when the morning nap ends early. The long walk often turns into a stroll around the block when Cam just isn't feeling it. And that thoughtful post usually ends up as more thoughts than actual blog post.

I've also rediscovered the joy of teaching. On Saturday mornings, I've been leading an informal prenatal yoga class at a neighbor's house. I've so enjoyed tweaking the pace of class to match the group's needs and introducing poses that hit the spot for what ails their pregnant bodies.

My favorite part of being a mom is watching Cam learn new things. We've started a mommy-son yoga practice with the help of Itsy Bitsy Yoga for infants and toddlers. The good morning series is his favorite, and he loves a good aerial headstand.

Yoga at 32 and 33 Weeks Pregnant

At 32 weeks, I dropped the ball with my weekly videos. I went to New York City with my husband for our last pre-baby getaway. When I returned Sunday evening, swollen and tired from the bus ride home, I decided my weekly yoga video was not a battle I needed to fight. Maybe I'm lazy. Maybe I lack discipline. Maybe I hit a milestone by not pushing myself beyond my energy reserves. Whatever the case, it is what is.

I was too imperfect to blog about my fall from perfectionism last weekend and thought I'd pick up the slack at 33 weeks. But again, it's just not happening. My back is revolting and I'd rather be doing soft, cushy poses from Iyengar Yoga for Motherhood than the ambitious poses I picked for my weekly videos.

My prenatal yoga teacher says motherhood is all about lowering your standards. That's what I'm practicing in these last few weeks of pregnancy.

Yoga at 31 Weeks Pregnant

Daily Life at 31 Weeks: Life threw me a curve ball this week. My house got broken into. All they took was a laptop and iPod, but that laptop had all my weekly pregnant yoga pictures on it. I'm hoping I can get them back from my YouTube videos somehow. That's a lot of hard work to lose! At the end of the week, my moms came into town. They cleaned my house and cooked and froze meals for the next few weeks. Now I'm set to waddle with ease through my upcoming week.

Practice at 31 Weeks: After an extra busy week at work and home, I've been practicing sitting on my butt this weekend. It's been amazing to open myself up to the gift of being cared for while my moms are in town. My therapist recommended that I practice opening myself up to help and good things especially in these last few weeks of pregnancy. She even suggested I do a heart opening asana sequence. Now that dinner is taken care of for every night this week, I may just get around to that practice.

Yoga at 30 Weeks Pregnant

Daily Life at 30 Weeks:  This week I finally let life go on at normal pace without me. Instead of forcing myself to keep up my usual routine at the gym, I took nights off here and there and came home to nap or do a gentle asana practice. It's odd for me to slow down so much, but it's paying off. When Friday rolled around this week, I was still on my feet and avoided descending into the moody, blubbering mess I was at the same time the week before.

Practice at 30 Weeks: I felt the first hint of lower back pain this week. I thought I would avoid that side effect of pregnancy because of my exercise and asana routine. Honestly though, my asana practice has not been routine. So, I took time out this afternoon to light some incense and do an hour side-lengthening practice. If I can just remember how good those feel, I'll be more motivated to get off my butt and practice more often. I think I could spend all day every day in this last trimester pampering myself with nutritious meals, cat naps, asana, meditation, and exercise.

Yoga at 29 Weeks Pregnant

Daily Life at 29 Weeks: I've had a bad attitude all week. My poor husband has had to listen to my complaints about physical discomforts and heavy workload. By Sunday, I realized that it just makes me feel worse when I whine. So, I've resolved to foster a positive outlook from now through the rest of the pregnancy. Sunday I took a long walk with a neighbor, spent time knitting and listening to Tara Brach, and watched the Super Bowl with my husband instead of rushing to get a jump start on the week and finish my yoga video. By the time I went to bed, I felt so much more relaxed.


Practice at 29 Weeks: We started learning about the first stage of labor in Bradley class this week. It was intimidating and scary, but somehow inspiring, too. Making it through labor requires total surrender and relaxation—physically, emotionally, and mentally. Now that I have an idea of what I'm preparing for, I'm that much more thankful I do yoga and already have a baseline practice that has made me familiar with how to let go. It's also huge motivation to practice, practice, practice.

Yoga at 28 Weeks Pregnant

Daily Life at 28 Weeks: I've finally come to the realization that I'm pregnant—really pregnant. Over the past week, I've struggled to maintain my usual activities and productivity. Up until now, I've been super pregnant woman. I work out, do asana, keep up with the house work, socialize, and am even learning how to run a communications department. But I'm slowing down. I can't do it all. The more I struggle with that reality, the more exhausted I become. The more okay I become with it, the more at peace I feel.

Practice at 28 Weeks: My weekly series of poses for these videos are becoming a bit challenging—especially the inversions. But I have to admit, I'm still getting a kick out of being able to do the inversions in my third trimester. My real yoga practice is managing my very pregnant emotions and learning to let go. Everything is changing, and my practice is to go with the flow.

Yoga at 27 Weeks Pregnant

Daily Life at 27 Weeks: Let's just say I'm impressed with myself for getting my video posted this week. I'm busy. I'm tired. It's time to get my priorities in order. It's also time to start asking for help and delegating tasks—at work and at home.

Practice at 27 Weeks: I feel the need to get serious about meditation and relaxation. I haven't done much of it in the past week because of how busy I've been with work. But this is the perfect opportunity to practice relaxation and mindfulness in the presence of activity and stress. If I can do it now, I can do it during labor.